The BlairVerseFest: contributions, please!

Some time ago (on 23 June, to be precise), in the comments on an Ephems post   about some verse written by Clement Attlee, Labour's greatest prime minister to date, including an Attlee limerick about himself, I invited Ephems readers to contribute some verse about Tony Blair, in the absence of evidence that he writes any about himself (or indeed about anything else).  I tried to start the ball rolling with this:

A young politician called Blair
Was distraught to be losing his hair
He said, "I'm appalled!
I shall soon be quite bald –
It just shows that the system's unfair."

I added:  Not brilliant, but it's a start. More, please.

Now Baralbion has gallantly risen to the occasion:

From Baralbion 
July 2nd, 2006 at 7:00 pm

A pity no-one has taken up the challenge posed by the prospect of a Blair Limerickfest. Here's my go:

Please don't disclose this letter
(Mrs B, I don't want to upset her).
But that Tony Blair
Is beginning to wear.
After him things can only get better.

I suppose you could say this had the makings of a new poetic form, the Blimerick. But you could also adapt that neglected form the Clerihew to produce a Blairihew, as in:

Of power Blair
Has had his share.
If he has any more
He'll become a bore

To which I added:

Brian applauds:  An excellent double whammy for starters.  Come on, chaps, follow that!  A Haiku (or Blaiku) would be welcome, too: "an unrhymed verse form of Japanese origin having three lines containing usually 5, 7, and 5 syllables respectively; also : a poem in this form usually having a seasonal reference" – Merriam-Webster.  Better these (not too difficult!):


Ageing Tony Blair
Moves slowly towards winter*
Not wanting to go

*[Note seasonal reference]


Tony Blair told his wife with a frown
That it wasn't yet time to stand down
But by 2009
It would surely be fine
To hand over to Chancellor Brown.


Tony Blair
Thought it very unfair:
He was increasingly afraid
He wouldn't complete his decade.

More, more!


5 Responses

  1. When fighting a war against terror,
    It’s important to minimise error,
    Put your boot through the door,
    At a quarter to four,
    Shoot a muslim – it couldn’t be fairer!

     and a haiku

    Blair’s brave legacy:
    Plan and wage aggressive war,
    Springtime for Tony.

  2. John Miles says:

    Mr Blair and New Labour

    At last – we thought – from Odious Sleaze we're freed;

    So goodbye Lies, Hypocrisy and Greed.

    The suddenly we saw, with Sad Surprise,

    We're stuck with Greed, Hypocrisy and Lies.

    An epitaph?

    He was guy who could always get away with it

    Brian writes:  Brilliant.  Pure Dryden (or is it Pope?).  Terrific stuff from Antipholus Papps, too.  Keep 'em coming in!  I almost begin to scent an anthology….

    Another epitaph:  Here lies Tony Blair for the last time


    That anagram of BLAIR
    Isn't entirely fair
    "B– Liar" doesn't arise
    If he believed his own lies.

  3. Baralbion says:

    OK, Brian, since you insist, a further Blimerick:

    A wild young man called Tone
    Left John’s with a will of his own
    But then lost his way
    And remains to this day
    A kind of Conservative clone.

    and a further Blairihew:

    Prime Minister Blair
    Had much to bear:
    His attempts at reform
    Just raised a storm.



  4. Bob says:

    Oh Gordon, why must we two fight

    When we’re both of us always so right?

    True, I said you’d succeed.

    But you didn’t  take heed

    Of my fingers behind me crossed tight!

  5. John Moore says:

    Brian, excellent site, packed with good stuff.
    Some contributions to swell the numbers:

    Said a beleaguered PM name of Blair
    "Don’t expect me to know where
    That nasty old Saddam
    Kept his bombs (if he had’em)
    ‘Cos if George says they’re there, then they’re there"

    World Cup hopes are dashed
    Outside Number 10
    Old Bill’s boots are heard- it’s summer

    Our Prime Minister
    Looks rather sinister
    When he claims to our youth
    That he’s telling the truth

    PS I cheated on the haiku (5,5,8) but I expect the subject would understand that.